The “funny” thing about age is it just happens to you. One day you wake up and you’re old. Well at least older than you were. And for the first time since puberty you begin to feel your age. Talking about aging is nothing new. In fact Nora Ephron did it a few years ago in her book “I Feel Bad About My Neck” which is a collection of essays about the dark passages of time. In the title piece she explains that her neck began to go in her early 40s, after an operation near her collarbone left a scar.
It was the post 40 aspect of this essay that I related to, as “waking up and feeling your age” is a phenomenon that begins to occur around this time. So what are the symptoms? Not sure I have enough room or time to go through them all, but I thought it might be worth highlighting a few that have begun to define me. Yeah, that’s right, define me.
In no particular order…..
- Lack of memory (more on this latter)
- Erratic sleep patterns (one night falling asleep on the sofa at 8pm and the next night walking the corridors at 1am)
- Serious lack of libido for your husband but hello young man at the coffee shop making my latte what is your name…
- Having to squint to read the small print
- You have to make a choice between your face and your butt. What a choice! This leads me to…
- Not just crow’s feet but marionette lines and all the lines without names that suddenly without permission appear on your face. Like above your lips, on your forehead and in the space between your eyes just above your nose. You know the one. It’s your very own harry potteresque lightening bolt and it quivers when you’re mad.
- Turning into a b-i-t-c-h not just part of the month but most of the month. Watch out for flying plates and libellous slander heading your way, it’s a 40+ woman on the warpath and it’s not going to be pretty.
And that’s not to mention gray hairs, hot and cold flashes, teenage-like PMS, gas, aches and pains in the knees, neck, back and hips. I mean its pretty crap isn’t it?
Okay, for a moment, let’s talk memory. (Or should I say lack there of.) Here’s a prime example:
It’s Saturday evening and we’re getting ready to go out. Husband is in shower, I am applying last bits of make-up. Husband calls out from shower, “there are no towels here, can you get me one?” Sure no problem. I go downstairs and instead of going straight to laundry room where said towels will be I bypass and go straight to the kitchen. Could I have forgotten about the towel in the time it took me to walk down the stairs? Hmmm. I see my son on the computer. He is downloading the new Glee Vol. 1 album for me and I am pleasantly distracted. Suddenly, we hear a loud stomping overhead. “What’s Daddy’s problem?” my son asks. “Don’t know,” I reply earnestly. Back to Glee. The next thing we know Husband appears starker’s, dripping wet in kitchen with fierce expression on his face. “Whoops I forgot your towel,” I say finally clocking it. What came out of his mouth is not repeatable here but it had something to do with me having a very small brain.
So am I the only one in this predicament? Are there other 40+ women out there suffering with similar “symptoms”. Please share! And if you are reading this and not yet 40+ hold on to your twenties or thirties or whatever age you might be, and hold on tight, because you are really going to miss them when they are gone.
In the meantime let’s eat cake. And pink champagne cake at that. Because it’s girly and it’s pink. And looks a little bit like a tutu. Something most 40+ women haven’t seen in a very long time. Enjoy!
Pink Champagne Cake
I made this cake in honour of What’s For Lunch Honey’s champagne Monthly Mingle. I am slightly late in posting so I am hoping she’ll still accept it! Meeta chose champagne because it is four years since she started her blog. Which is an amazing achievement. Take a look at her blog as it is a visual treat you don’t want to miss.
For the cake:
2 cup plus 2 tbsp all-purpose flour
1 tbsp nonfat milk powder
1 tbsp baking powder
1/2 tsp salt
1/2 cup unsalted butter, at room temperature
1/4 cup oil
1 1/2 cup granulated sugar
5 egg whites
1 tsp vanilla extract
pink food coloring
1 cup champagne or sparkling wine
Preheat oven to 350 degrees and prepare two 8-inch pans.
In large bowl, combine flour, milk powder, baking powder, and salt. Whisk to combine and set aside.
In bowl mix butter, oil and granulated sugar. Beat until light and fluffy in texture and in colour, about 3 minutes.
Add egg whites, one at a time, scraping sides of bowl as mixing.
Add vanilla extract and pink food colouring (not too much or it will be very pink) and stir to combine.
Scrape down sides of bowl to make sure all ingredients are incorporated and slowly add flour mixture and champagne.
Stir ingredients with large spatula until just barely combined.
Pour mixture into prepared pans and tap light to remove excess air bubbles.
Place into center of oven and bake until toothpick inserted into center of cake comes out clean, about 25-28 minutes.
Remove from oven and let cool in pans for 15 minutes. Turn out onto wire racks and let cool completely before decorating.
Layer and decorate with icing of choice and serve. I used a basic buttercream and added some more pink food colouring and edible fairy dust on top.